Tonight Jana had an ultrasound. The ultrasound technician said he was "99% sure it's a girl." The problem is, he only seemed about 72% sure, if that. So don't be surprised if our baby girl gets a mid-pregnancy sex change.
Luke and Max were fascinated with the ultrasound for about 10 seconds until they realized they couldn't really see anything. Jana had been telling them all day that we were "going to see the baby tonight." Of course Luke was sure that meant the baby was coming out and he was going to see it in person!
We are way excited it's a girl (we hope), and I think I even convinced Luke to be excited too, as he was hoping for another brother.
Putting Luke to bed tonight we had our 1st official "Birds & the Bees" conversation. No I'm not kidding, and I was laughing so hard! The following is exactly what was said, not modified in any way:
Luke: "Dad - how did the baby get in mommy's tummy?"
A very surprised me: "I don't know Luke."
Luke: "Did Heavenly Father put it there?"
Me: "Yeah! I think he did!"
Luke: "Is that magic dad?"
Me: "It IS magic Luke!"
Luke: "Did Heavenly Father say the magic words?"
Me: "I don't know Luke, maybe."
Luke: "Like at the circus dad?"
Me: "Maybe Luke."
Luke: "Zing Zang Zoom?"
Me: "Yep Luke."
Luke: "Cool dad."
Me: "Goodnight Luke."
If a little boy can be that sweet, I can't wait to see how sweet our little girl will be!
Friday, October 02, 2009
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
MJFC
I know everyone's tired of reading about Michael Jackson. So am I. And maybe I'm 2 weeks late on this post but it's my blog so I'm gonna post it anyway. What I'm about to share is a piece of my life history and belongs here.In high school I was a member of the coolest club around. No, it wasn't the Freelance Pissers Club (of which I was also a member). I was a card-carrying member (can't remember if we had cards or not) of the Viewmont Michael Jackson Fan Club (MJFC for short). Every week we would get together at someone's house to practice our moonwalks, watch Michael videos, drink Jesus Juice (grape juice), and decorate white gloves. I had a MJFC t-shirt that I even wore to school once. No I am not kidding. All this at the very peak of MJ's unmatched weirdness.
I had the honor of being appointed club secretary. As secretary, I was responsible for creation of the MJFC monthly newsletter (really a 1-page flier slapped together on WordPerfect), which I did faithfully for all of 2 months. The newsletter contained MJ news and rumors, pictures, and a message from our President and my good friend Justin.
Sure, it was all just one big excuse to hang out with friends. And yes, we thought we were cooler than the other kids because of it (because we were). But because of the MJFC I gained an appreciation for the career of the King of Pop that I wouldn't have otherwise had.
Conan Overdose?
Late last night while watching Conan, I realized something. I wasn't laughing. At all. Sure, I may have broken the occasional smile, but I don't think I LOL'ed (gosh I hate that acronym with a passion) once. And when I started thinking about it, I think the longer Conan has been hosting the Tonight Show, the less I've been laughing.Has Conan lost his touch? Or maybe since he's moved to an earlier time he's changed his style? Or maybe he's like cheesecake... good to eat every once in awhile, but not an appropriate dessert every single night (I never watched nightly before).
Whatever it is, I've been disappointed recently, am about ready to give up watching regularly, and I miss my Monday headlines. The Jay Leno show can't come fast enough.
Monday, May 25, 2009
The debate is over: Five Guys is the one and only true hamburger
If you worship the false idol that is In-N-Out Burger, you will no doubt find this post offensive. I do not apologize for the harsh words I'm about to lay down, as they are the truth. And it is hard to hear the truth when you've been living in the sin that is In-N-Out. If I have to climb the city wall to protect myself like Samuel the Lamanite, so be it. Oh crap, Woods Cross doesn't really have a city wall... maybe the railroad wall?
Over the years I've gotten to know quite a few people who belong to the organized religion of In-N-Out. No other burger ever measures up, no matter how good it is. If it doesn't come in an In-N-Out wrapper, it's second-rate. To even consider another burger on the same level is blasphemous.
About a year ago - I got word of a different burger religion. Perhaps you could even call it a fast-food religious revival. Utah was now home to Five Guys Burgers & Fries. I was confused. Which church should I, oops, I mean, which burger should I eat?
Before joining a religion, it is wise to list the pros and cons of each...
In-N-Out pros: Great hamburgers. Cheap prices. Those are honestly the only 2 pros I can think of. In-N-Out cons: Their fries are no good. Anyone who says their fries are "the best" is a liar. They don't have any locations North of St. George. I realize this will change soon, but for now it's a con. And now the worst con of all,the "insider" language! It bugs me so bad! Why can't they just put all the "styles" on the menu? How am I to know what animal style is if I've never been told? What other styles are there that I don't know about? All the secrecy is lame, and it inflates the "insiders" (aka idol worshippers) egos to unbearable levels.
Five Guys pros: Great hamburgers. And the prices are pretty cheap if you order the right thing (hint - the little hamburger isn't little). And they offer free peanuts. And not only are the fries better, a small order could feed a family of 8. And they offer fry sauce (probably only in Utah). Five guys cons: It probably costs a dollar more than In-N-Out. That's about the only con I can think of.
To appease Cheeseboy and honor my grandfather on this Memorial Day - I will make mention of one more burger joint.... Crown Burger. Crown Burger was my grandpa's favorite, is my brother's favorite, and continues to be a family favorite. But comparing Crown Burger to the other two restaurants mentioned above is comparing apples and oranges. First of all, Crown Burger offers much more than burgers and fries. The fact you can order fried chicken and a salad puts Crown Burger in an entirely different category. And the fact there are so many Crown Burger copy cats forces me to draw the line somewhere. What's next? Comparing Apollo Burgers?
So bring it on In-And-Out. It'll be nice to have you here. And while I'll shudder every time I hear someone say "Animal Style," "2x4," or any other insider term that is only learned at one of your cult meetings, I'll be glad you're here and welcome you with open arms - if it means shorter lines at Five Guys.
The debate is over. Five Guys is the one and only true hamburger.
Over the years I've gotten to know quite a few people who belong to the organized religion of In-N-Out. No other burger ever measures up, no matter how good it is. If it doesn't come in an In-N-Out wrapper, it's second-rate. To even consider another burger on the same level is blasphemous.
About a year ago - I got word of a different burger religion. Perhaps you could even call it a fast-food religious revival. Utah was now home to Five Guys Burgers & Fries. I was confused. Which church should I, oops, I mean, which burger should I eat?Before joining a religion, it is wise to list the pros and cons of each...
In-N-Out pros: Great hamburgers. Cheap prices. Those are honestly the only 2 pros I can think of. In-N-Out cons: Their fries are no good. Anyone who says their fries are "the best" is a liar. They don't have any locations North of St. George. I realize this will change soon, but for now it's a con. And now the worst con of all,the "insider" language! It bugs me so bad! Why can't they just put all the "styles" on the menu? How am I to know what animal style is if I've never been told? What other styles are there that I don't know about? All the secrecy is lame, and it inflates the "insiders" (aka idol worshippers) egos to unbearable levels.
Five Guys pros: Great hamburgers. And the prices are pretty cheap if you order the right thing (hint - the little hamburger isn't little). And they offer free peanuts. And not only are the fries better, a small order could feed a family of 8. And they offer fry sauce (probably only in Utah). Five guys cons: It probably costs a dollar more than In-N-Out. That's about the only con I can think of.
To appease Cheeseboy and honor my grandfather on this Memorial Day - I will make mention of one more burger joint.... Crown Burger. Crown Burger was my grandpa's favorite, is my brother's favorite, and continues to be a family favorite. But comparing Crown Burger to the other two restaurants mentioned above is comparing apples and oranges. First of all, Crown Burger offers much more than burgers and fries. The fact you can order fried chicken and a salad puts Crown Burger in an entirely different category. And the fact there are so many Crown Burger copy cats forces me to draw the line somewhere. What's next? Comparing Apollo Burgers?
So bring it on In-And-Out. It'll be nice to have you here. And while I'll shudder every time I hear someone say "Animal Style," "2x4," or any other insider term that is only learned at one of your cult meetings, I'll be glad you're here and welcome you with open arms - if it means shorter lines at Five Guys.
The debate is over. Five Guys is the one and only true hamburger.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Re: Walter Duckface
This post is in response to Cheeseboy's earlier post about Walter Duckface.
Walter Duckface (aka Whit Hertford - please click his name to see a picture as this will help you appreciate the story - I'm not going to post the picture in fear of getting sued) and I have a long history. A history that Walter has no idea even exists.
I too was a Full House aficionado. I appreciated me some Uncle Jesse (have mercy) and Uncle Joey action (well blow me down). Worst Popeye impression ever, by the way. I had an appreciation for DJ, Kimmy Gibler and the Olson twins. But the best episodes always seemed to revolve around Stephanie's weird friends.
Walter Duckface was a classic episode that has been burned in my memory forever. So as the fates would have it, Walter and I would have a few run-ins down this crazy road that we call life.
Walter and my best friend Nate ended up in a class together at the U of U. No kidding. It wasn't an institute class, so whether he's a Mormon or not I couldn't say. But this I do know: He called Utah home about 10 years ago. Nate and I thought it was random awesomeness. To my knowledge, Walter never spoke of having a 2-episode role in Full House. He did however talk of his role in the Blockbuster Jurassic Park. The funny thing is that his role in Jurassic Park is nearly identical to his role in Full House. He plays a very duckface-ish character.
Anyway - One night Nate and I and some friends were at Movies 10 in Sugarhouse. I don't remember the movie we were there to see but I do vividly remember seeing Walter Duckface in the lobby. Of course my eyes were drawn to him. He was a local celebrity for Peter Breinholt's sake. It was like running into Kurt Bestor at Wendy's. You too would watch what Kurt Bestor orders. Is he going for the spicy chicken or the 5-piece nugget?
So there I was, staring at Walter Duckface from afar, when I noticed he was concealing an outside beverage inside his levi jacket. As he attempted to pass by the 17-year old pimply-faced ticket taker, the ticket taker spotted the outside food or drink. It was quite a sight to behold. And I kid you not, this is exactly how the conversation went...
Ticket Taker: "Excuse me mam... Excuse me mam... Mam... You can't bring in outside food or beverage."
Walter Duckface: "Well since you called me mam I think I can."
Ticket Taker: "Oh, I'm sorry." Both were bright red from embarrassment at this point. "But you still can't take in the drink."
Walter Duckface then discards the beverage in a nearby trash receptacle, throwing it violently into the garbage, and walks into the movie theater with a disgusted and heartbroken look on his face.
END OF ACT 1
I really felt sorry for Duckface. But the more I thought about it, the less sorry I felt. Sure, he was mistaken for a woman. But because of his looks he was able to land some pretty impressive Hollywood roles. We can't all be Brad Pitt. Someone has to play the Walter Duckface roles of the world. Good for Walter.
It has been nearly 10 years since that night, and I haven't seen Duckface since. While memories fade and good times become fuzzy, the experience remains in my mind, vividly. Like the time I bumped into Donny Osmond at the local Hogi Yogi. But that's another story...
ps. If you doubt any of the above events, I'm sure Nate's got my back on this.
Walter Duckface (aka Whit Hertford - please click his name to see a picture as this will help you appreciate the story - I'm not going to post the picture in fear of getting sued) and I have a long history. A history that Walter has no idea even exists.
I too was a Full House aficionado. I appreciated me some Uncle Jesse (have mercy) and Uncle Joey action (well blow me down). Worst Popeye impression ever, by the way. I had an appreciation for DJ, Kimmy Gibler and the Olson twins. But the best episodes always seemed to revolve around Stephanie's weird friends.
Walter Duckface was a classic episode that has been burned in my memory forever. So as the fates would have it, Walter and I would have a few run-ins down this crazy road that we call life.
Walter and my best friend Nate ended up in a class together at the U of U. No kidding. It wasn't an institute class, so whether he's a Mormon or not I couldn't say. But this I do know: He called Utah home about 10 years ago. Nate and I thought it was random awesomeness. To my knowledge, Walter never spoke of having a 2-episode role in Full House. He did however talk of his role in the Blockbuster Jurassic Park. The funny thing is that his role in Jurassic Park is nearly identical to his role in Full House. He plays a very duckface-ish character.
Anyway - One night Nate and I and some friends were at Movies 10 in Sugarhouse. I don't remember the movie we were there to see but I do vividly remember seeing Walter Duckface in the lobby. Of course my eyes were drawn to him. He was a local celebrity for Peter Breinholt's sake. It was like running into Kurt Bestor at Wendy's. You too would watch what Kurt Bestor orders. Is he going for the spicy chicken or the 5-piece nugget?
So there I was, staring at Walter Duckface from afar, when I noticed he was concealing an outside beverage inside his levi jacket. As he attempted to pass by the 17-year old pimply-faced ticket taker, the ticket taker spotted the outside food or drink. It was quite a sight to behold. And I kid you not, this is exactly how the conversation went...
Ticket Taker: "Excuse me mam... Excuse me mam... Mam... You can't bring in outside food or beverage."
Walter Duckface: "Well since you called me mam I think I can."
Ticket Taker: "Oh, I'm sorry." Both were bright red from embarrassment at this point. "But you still can't take in the drink."
Walter Duckface then discards the beverage in a nearby trash receptacle, throwing it violently into the garbage, and walks into the movie theater with a disgusted and heartbroken look on his face.
END OF ACT 1
I really felt sorry for Duckface. But the more I thought about it, the less sorry I felt. Sure, he was mistaken for a woman. But because of his looks he was able to land some pretty impressive Hollywood roles. We can't all be Brad Pitt. Someone has to play the Walter Duckface roles of the world. Good for Walter.
It has been nearly 10 years since that night, and I haven't seen Duckface since. While memories fade and good times become fuzzy, the experience remains in my mind, vividly. Like the time I bumped into Donny Osmond at the local Hogi Yogi. But that's another story...
ps. If you doubt any of the above events, I'm sure Nate's got my back on this.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Product Review: Dish DVR-Pal
A few months ago Jana and I were looking at ways to cut monthly expenses. Going through our Dish Network DVR timers, we found we taped something like 22 shows. Out of those 22, 19 of those were from over-the-air stations (2, 4, 5 etc.). So it seemed like an easy choice... Dump the dish.But one thing made it not quite so easy: Dumping the Dish meant dumping the DVR. I'm assuming most of you have a DVR by now. If you do, you understand that once you go DVR, you don't go back. It's the only way to watch TV.
So after quite a bit of online research - I found the perfect solution: The Dish DVR-Pal. The DVR-Pal is a digital-to-analog converter box. But it much more than that. It has a DVR built in. It records and plays back HD video. It is exactly what we were looking for.
PROS: It's absolutely free. This will save us $50-60 a month! Tivo offers basically the same thing for MORE money AND you have to pay a monthly subsription fee to use it.
As Luke gets older we'll have less crap on TV for us to worry about him watching. It uses the exact same Dish remote that we're used to and the interface is almost the exact same. Lastly, I now have an HD-DVR (I wasn't willing to pay the extra money for this). We also pick up way more channels than I was expecting.
CONS: It cost $249.00. It will take 4 or 5 months to pay for itself. Also, when I record in HD it looks like it's going to fill up the hard drive pretty fast so we'll have to stay on top of our TV viewing. It doesn't give me the option of recording HD or SD, so if a show is HD it records HD. The timers aren't smart - so if The Office has a special hour-long episode we'll have to manually adjust it. And Dish Network didn't want to sell it to me since I'm a current Dish customer, so I had to have it shipped to my brother's house. Lame.
Also, since the remote is only IR, it only works in the room where the reciever is located. Since we wanted to use ours throughout the entire house, I found a nice workaround for this and purchased this nifty UHF remote extender that seems to be working quite well so far.
So far I would HIGHLY recommend this product to anyone who would like to save $50+ a month but cannot live without a DVR! It is an excellent product and exactly what we were looking for.
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